Utah Living: Callings, Blessings and Revelation

Life lessons... everybody has to deal with them and unfortunately they aren't always our best friends. It's always been interesting to me how issues can be dealt out among even the best of us, and how life can feel like one big game of Russian Roulette. As sad as that is, it's really opened my eyes to a brutally painful fact regarding this dispensation and our generation. Both negative and positive opportunities are presented to us every day, and every day our faith and strength is tested. We were saved for this time because our Heavenly Father knew that we would be strong enough to handle what we would be facing and how horribly mislead these generations would come to be. The way I see it, either you can sink or you can swim. I, with my choice to have been baptized and become a fully dedicated member of this church have decided to swim, and I don't plan on giving up until I've reached that promised tropical paradise at the end. All my life I've been taught that the harder you work the better reward you get at the end and the happier you feel. But it seems like most people have failed to receive this information, which has just lead to more defeat, anguish and straight up laziness.

As it got closer and closer to time for me to pack up my life at home and leave my perfect town of San Diego California for the famous little town known as Provo Utah, questions and doubts started rearing their ugly little heads. "Things are perfect here, just stay!" "Why are you moving? Is it just for your mormon school?" "You don't even know who you are or what you want, you're just blindly following your church and that's stupid!". The ridicule got worse and worse as the time got closer and closer and that's when I realized that this indeed was the best decision that I could have possibly made during this time in my life. I've always been taught that when you're on the right track, Satan always tries his best to bring you down and that's when he works even harder than usual. Now, I've known for almost a year that moving to Utah was something that I needed to do, and honestly besides realizing that I needed to join the church and go through with my baptism, coming to the Utah conclusion was my first time dealing with personal revelation. And I have Elder Kirchhoefer to thank. But even though I never received an answer to why I needed to move, just that I needed to move, it made it a little harder but a lot more exciting. To this day I still don't know why I was supposed to come here. But I'm here to figure out why. So I suppose I'm working towards figure it out while I am here.

I am a strong believer in To Each Their Own, and Don't Ask Don't Tell. I've never been somebody that's quick to judge or think differently of somebody just because I heard something from a He said She said situation. I've been given plenty of reasons in my life to give up and stop swimming, as have plenty of other people in the world and even my own siblings have had it harder than I have. That's to say, we are some pretty strong people because we are still alive and well. I've just chosen to take the road less traveled and dedicate my life to the Gospel and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. But in order to be ready to receive the Gospel I had to be incredibly humbled, and through that I've received so many blessings in my life just in the past year and a half since I was baptized. I've met incredible people, made great choices for happiness and have become incredibly involved in the church with my callings and the relationships that I've managed to make through my ward and the mission!

Even though we have agency, everything happens for a reason. Everybody has to spread their wings and fly eventually and I just happen to be doing this with a bit more spirit than most people would think to. I know I never got to explain to some of my friends and family why I left. I hope some of you are reading this and will understand why I made this decision. I'm not just here for my Mormon School or to blindly follow my church, I came here because God called me to be here and I know that nothing but good can come from this. I'm sorry to those I may have hurt during my last few weeks or months being home and I'm sorry that I never really explained myself, especially to some of my family. I just feared more rejection and in order for me to have gone through with such a huge spiritual step in my life, I needed to get away from all negativity. I love you all though, I love all my old friends and I will love all the new friends and family I make while I am up here. I hope that I can be a positive example to you, I know things in our life and family haven't always been the best and we've not always been the happiest, but I pray that I will be able to become a better person while I am here so when I come home I can better serve. I want to do my best at making sure my family is happy and well off and I know that I am exactly where I am supposed to be in order to do so.

As I Flee The Nest

At this time in my life, things are changing so much. I'm moving away from my home in San Diego California to my new home with two other roommates in Provo Utah. During this time, I've pondered and prayed about a lot of things and even though I don't necessarily know why I need to move to Utah I do know that I am doing the right thing by following these promptings.
I've learned so much over this last year and a half since I've joined the church and I've gained so many great ideas for this blog that I've been neglecting for so long. But I know that once I move to Provo, get myself settled in, and really start my life over there, there will be much more time for this.
I'm just happy that I am getting the chance to really do what I feel like Heavenly Father needs me to do in order to stay on the path that will lead me to the best my life could possibly be. Which all links back to personal revelation and pondering and praying for things. That is always kind of a touchy subject for people since it really does take a lot to be spiritually connected to God. We all tend to get caught up in the worldly things of life and we have our good moments then we have our bad.
What we as LDS people have to do, is really try and learn how we connect with Heavenly Father the most. Fortunately enough I've learned this lesson with the help of my good friend Elder Kirchhoefer, and that's why I know that this move to Provo is the right move. Even though I won't be going to school right away, sometimes you just have to get out of your comfort zone and see if you sink or swim! Which is what I'm ready to do now.
I'm super thankful for all of my wonderful friends and family I've made since joining the church and I love you all with all of my heart. You've helped me to become the person I am today. You've helped me become strong enough for this move and this great new adventure. I can't wait to write more about my journeys for my friends and family who are staying behind. Thank you for always being there for me, no matter what.
I love you guys.

Mission President Fireside.

On Sunday July 8, 2012 I had the amazing privilege to speak at the Mission President Fireside. Honestly, that night was one of the best nights of my life, and what made it even better is that it took me completely by surprise! Which is always a good thing, I love surprises.

But anyways, for those of you who have no clue what a M.P Fireside is, it's when all the missionaries within the mission come together in one of the stake centers, along with the Mission President and his wife, members ranging from lifetime members to recent converts to investigators. And during the fireside, certain missionaries perform musical pieces and recent converts go up on stage to share their testimony with the congregation. 

So ideally, for somebody like me who is ALWAYS looking for opportunities to have missionary moments and who is DYING to go on her mission; this was the most perfect thing I could have done at this time in my life and I will always remember the spirit that took place that night while listening to the other people sharing their testimonies, then how it felt as I shared mine.Unfortunately though, none of my close friends were able to go and listen due to last minute scheduling and unfortunate circumstances. So I promised that I'd post on my blog what I spoke about. 

Yeah, I know. Weird that I had everything written out when I just previously stated that this whole things was a surprise. But in all reality, it had been the plan for me to speak for several months, then that suddenly changed, and then it suddenly changed again and I ended up speaking after all! Meaning that I've had several months to come up with what I wanted to say and type it out. I wanted it to be perfect and there was so much that I wanted to say, I really wanted to make sure that everything came out right.

So here it is!!
[Up until this point, I just spoke from the heart. I introduced myself, stated I was baptized March 26, 2011 and that I was confirmed a member March 27, 2011 by Allen Read and Elder Saager. I told them about my missionaries, Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa and how funny they were and how they practically hunted me down just to sit and talk with me. I talked about how I came to church the first time with Savannah Read and her family and how I've gotten really close to that whole family. Also about how weird I felt being at church in jeans and a t-shirt! So right before where I started reading off what I wrote, I talked about how I had been shopping with Savannah the day after I met Elder Malietoa with Elder Saager right after transfers and how they had been hunting me down. I felt worried that I had gotten myself in trouble and that lead immediately to my first meeting EVER with them. But MOST of you know this story and if you don't then everything is in previous posts on this blog if you're interested! FYI, this all flowed together pretty nicely if I do say so myself.]

*officially starts*

But when I came downstairs and saw how happy they looked, I crossed that off the list immediately.  Then we sat down in Savannah’s living room and we began what was my first lesson with them. That day was also the day that I received my Book of Mormon and that’s when my life officially began. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was feeling the spirit. I felt our Father in Heaven’s presence through those two young men. The moment Elder Saager placed the book in my hands; I knew that it was true. But I decided to take on the challenge that they presented to me anyways, by reading and praying to ask our Heavenly Father if this was true. The next morning, I woke up before my dad, and I sat at the dining room table then began to read. As I was reading throughout the introduction I began to pray and ask, if I had finally found the truth. If that the feelings to keep testing the waters of this church were a good thing. Then halfway reading through the introduction, it felt as if Heavenly Father was saying to me “Stop asking. You know this is true. So just start reading”

I was filled with joy. I was filled with the spirit and I couldn’t wait to meet with the Elders again.

Within two weeks of meeting with the Elders twice, sometimes even three times a week I had decided that I wanted to get baptized when Elder Malietoa told me that there was going to be a baptism in a week from then and asked me if I wanted to get baptized too. Looking back it seems like a dream, it all went so well and so quickly. But I know that the decision to be baptized was, is and always will be the best decision I’ve ever made in my entire life. And even though my life’s not even half over, nothing but good can come from this decision as long as I keep the commandments and covenants that I made the day I was baptized.

This last year, I’ve been able to accomplish more than I’ve ever even expected to. I’ve learned of the love that Heavenly Father and His son, my savior, Jesus Christ have for me. I’ve learned of the atonement and how it was formed, not only for every one of you, but for me too. Before this year, I never knew how it was possible to love God. Everybody around me would talk about how much they loved Him, and that just didn’t make sense to me. I wanted to be able to love Him, I really did. But it never made sense until coming to this church and learning of how strong His love is for us, for me.

Through this decision, I’ve met my family. They may not be of blood; they may not be perfect, or related to me in any way. But they share the same beliefs as I do, they love Heavenly Father as I do, and they love me as I love them. I’ve had the opportunity to meet many of the wonderful missionaries that are here right now and have grown to call them my brothers, my sisters and best of all, my friends. And that is a blessing all in its own, considering my love for missionary work just as a regular member.

This journey definitely has brought its ups and downs. I have had my down in the dump moments and had the opportunity to uplift myself with the spirit by praying, reading the scriptures, meeting with these wonderful missionaries and talking with our Father in Heaven. Then I’ve had the uplifting experience of being a part of my mom, my dad, and my younger brother receiving lessons from the missionaries as well. Every day is filled with new experiences that are helping me grow and develop into the person that I am supposed to be while here.

This April, I had the opportunity to go to Salt Lake for conference with Savannah and her family. It seriously was the most amazing experience ever and I came away with a lot more knowledge, not only of myself, but of the church, the gospel and of things that I never even thought of before. Elder Russell M. Nelson gave a talk called Thanks Be to God on the Sunday morning session and he said “How much better it would be if all could be more aware of God’s providence and love and express that gratitude to Him. Ammon taught, “Let us give thanks to [God], for he doth work righteousness forever.” Our degree of gratitude is a measure of our love for Him.”

This quote really helped me define my love for Heavenly Father, and everything He has done for us. It truly added to the spirit that had taken place that day immensely and that leads me to what I would like to close with.

The missionaries met me in a very weird time of my life. My world was being turned upside down, and I felt as if I had fallen below rock bottom.

It all started with a prayer. One prayer, one last desperate attempt of trying to make things right once and for all; and even though I didn’t think He was listening to me, and I didn’t even know if He was real at that time. He listened to me and humbled me enough to the point where I was ready to receive the Gospel and meet Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa.

Everything that they taught and shared with me has with me throughout the year. But one thing, that I remember making the initial change in my heart was something that Elder Saager shared with me regarding living the commandments and following Jesus Christ.

He said this was something that he liked to think of, and said something along the lines of: “Mary-Kate, how would you feel if Jesus Christ walked into this room, this very moment?
 [and as he said this, I pictures Him walking into the room, and standing behind the couch that Saager and Malietoa were seated in]. “Would you be embarrassed with whom you were with? What you were wearing? What you were doing, talking about and even thinking? Would you feel ashamed to be in the presence of our Savior? Or express complete joy and embrace him?”

As he was telling me this, and sharing that he would sometimes ask himself these questions as somewhat of a self-evaluation, it was as if I was in the presence of Christ. Elder Saager was so new on his mission at that point, yet so ready to share these things with me and for me, and I was more than ready to receive. I’m eternally grateful. For everything Heavenly Father has allowed to happen in my life; whether they came from the missionaries, my friends in the church or even my own actions. 

My mission in life is to testify of Christ, and testify of Him I shall do. I cannot deny his grace. And I cannot deny the truth that lies in this Gospel. Or of the love that He has for us.

I know that this church is true, and I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The love that I felt from my Heavenly Father that night was one of the times I've felt it the best. The love I felt from the wonderful missionaries that were there that night and the brothers and sisters of mine that I hadn't even met before confirmed in my heart that I helped change somebodies life that night. I pray every day for the opportunity to help bring others unto Christ, and that has turned out to be a very big goal of mine. Until the day I leave for my mission, I think opportunities like this will continue to help train me and prepare me.

 Elder Saager and I after the Fireside. 

A Special Spirit About

There's a certain spirit about this morning, I woke up to an empty house and for the first time in a very long time I've felt comfortable enough to pray and read my scriptures in my own house. So I definitely took advantage of that, and I've been pondering the things that I've been learning and encountering these last couple of weeks since I last posted in here.

The summer semester of Institute classes has finally started up again, and I am taking a class with brother Miller on the Gospel of John. Now, out of all four of the Gospels, John is the one that focuses mostly on Jesus and who he was as a person while he was taking on the flesh of the world during his time here. I chose to sign up for this class because during my entire time being a Christian and during my entire time being a member of this church, I've not learned much about the Bible. Which is sad to say considering my past experiences, but that's beside the point. I now feel as if I am ready to embark on the wonderful spirit and blessings that can be brought forth from reading outside of just the Book or Mormon of the Doctrine and Covenants. NOT that those aren't great themselves, I just feel ready to expand my knowledge; I feel like I'm spiritually strong enough to truly understand and remember what I read and learn about in the Bible. Which is a very good thing because I've never felt that confident in my readings of the scriptures ever before!

So in the class with brother Miller, it can be very hard to follow along with what he is talking about. But that is just simply because of the spirit that he is bringing into the classroom. I don't know much about either testaments, and I really don't know anything about the Gospels or even why they are called the Gospels. I didn't even realize that was where I stood until Wednesday night when brother Miller asked me to give the purpose behind this class and what we are meant to learn. I didn't have an answer, so I told him where I stood and how I lack an understanding of things. Even though I felt as if my answer were inappropriate and that I should have had a better answer, I realize that was perfect! We were placed on this earth because we are not perfect, and we don't know everything. We came here so we can work towards perfection, so of course nobody is going to know everything. Even people who have a complete and full understanding of the Gospels can always learn something new from the scriptures if they allow themselves to.

I guess that is one of my proudest little self accomplishments this week, oddly enough. I feel like I've come to ease with the fact that I don't know as much as I feel like I should. But as long as I continue on with my willingness to learn and gain more to my testimony, then I am in the right place!

What I love the most about learning and reading from the Gospel of John, is that it get's more intimate and personal with who Jesus Christ was. I love learning about Christ, because I have a very special relationship with Him that even I'm still learning about.

But on the first day of class, brother Miller asked a few of us how we see Heavenly Father when we pray. He asked us in a very soft and comforting tone to explain what we see and feel. I honestly never really thought of what I saw and felt, I've just always known and understood. So to explain it was a little weird. But I'm glad that he asked us that, because if it weren't for that questions then I don't think I would have started this deeply personal relationship that I have with both Heavenly Father and Jesus.

I feel like my thoughts have just been splattered all over the place with this post, but I guess splatters isn't exactly a bad thing! It just helps me realize how thankful I am to be a member of this church. I hope that everybody can come to have that personal relationship with our Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ, it's much more amazing when you can actually picture yourself with them. So I hope you can figure that out for yourself. It's an amazing blessing.

All of this has come to help me realize that if it weren't for me being a convert to this church then I would have never been able to gain as strong of a testimony of this Gospel and church that I have. I love that I had to work for it, and I love that I am still working for it! I love that I had to go through phases in order to be ready to meet my missionaries and receive the Gospel. That journey is what made me who I am today, and I am a very very happy person. I am happy because I know of God's love and I will never forget that. Never.

Sister Missionary To Be!

For the last few months, I've had the opportunity to teach several Gospel Principle classes. And may I just say, I LOVE IT! I love seeing the faces of my friends, and of people that are investigating the church and I share with them the lesson of the week and sharing my testimony of them. Throughout these last few months, I've had several opportunities to teach several classes, whether it was my Pathway class or Gospel Principles, and I've been told that I have a knack for teaching. So whenever I get the opportunity to, I take advantage of it with nothing but positive intent.

The joy that I feel, knowing that I am helping strengthen somebody's testimony and helping lead them closer to our Father in Heaven is one of the sweetest gifts I think I've ever received. I honestly love knowing that I am doing what I am suppose to do while here, and that's serving and loving others. Which leads to the topic of MY MISSION!!! I honestly can not wait, I have two years to go until I am old enough and this is the time that I am going to need to exercise patience like a mad woman! Which is a battle I definitely will be battling for years to come, and I know that for a fact. My age has always been a struggle for me, my entire life that's what I've been the most self conscious about surprisingly! I've always been the youngest, and now that I am a member of the church and everything has gone so well, smoothly and quickly; I feel like the next step is to go through the temple and go on a mission. But of course, I'm too young. And that is probably going to be the most excruciating thing I'm going to have to deal with for the rest of this time. But I definitely have some pretty exciting things to help occupy myself until then! Like UTAH VALLEY UNIVERSITY! I'm EXTREMELY stoked about that, I get to go to college finally, I am going to be closer to my best friends Savannah and Emily AND several of the great missionaries that I've gotten close with since their on their mission down here [including Elder Saager] will be up in that area shortly after their missions. So it's not all that bad!

Now, back to the mission thing. Something that my lovely Relief Society President Jeni Perez told me one day really touched my heart and I feel will honestly help me through these next two years. ALONG with a story she shared with me when she heard about my relationships with my missionaries.

So, when I was expressing my frustration in not being old enough to go on a mission and she told me that there is a reason for that. Out there somewhere are people that are preparing to be ready to receive the Gospel and they are being prepared for me. Me, Mary-Kate, I am going to be the one that will be ready to share the Gospel with them and help lead them properly into the waters of baptism. There's always a reason for everything and I am very thankful for her sharing that with me.

THEN, there's the story. Which I've heard several times before she shared it with me. I am so thankful for this story, because I truly believe that my missionaries, Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa were my close friends in the preexistence and this story is very applicable to my conversion story, my life now and my friendships with my missionaries.

The following event took place in a ward in Salt Lake City in 1974. It ocurred during the sacrament meeting and was told to me by a regional representative of the Twelve who was in the meeting. A young man, just before leaving on his mission stood in sacrament meeting and bore in essence the following:

Brothers and sisters, as you know, the past two weeks I have been waiting for my mission call. During the time I was waiting I had a dream. I knew it was not an ordinary dream. I dreamed I was in the pre-existence and awaiting my call to come to earth. I was filled with the same anticipation and excitement that I had before I received my mission call. In my dream I was talking to a friend, and I felt a special closeness to him, even though I have never met him in this life. As we talked a messenger came and gave me a letter. I knew it was my call to go to earth. In great excitement my friend and I opened the letter. I gave it to him and asked him to read it aloud. It said:

“You’ve been called to go to earth in a special time and to a special land. You will be born to the true church and you will have the priesthood of God in your home. You will be born into a land of plenty, and a land of frreedom. You will go to earth in the United States of America.”

My friend and I rejoiced as we read my call, and while we were rejoicing the messenger r eturned. This time he had a letter for my friend. We knew it was his call to earth. My friend gave me the letter to read out loud. His letter said:

“You’ve been called to go to earth in circumstances of poverty and strife. You will not be raised in the true church. Many hardships will attend your life. Your land will be fraught with political and social difficulties which will hinder the work of the Lord. You will be born in Costa Rica.”

We wept, my friend and I, as we read his call. And my friend looked at me with tears in his eyes, and said, “When we are down on earth, you in your choice land and me in Costa rica, my friend, please come and find me.”

Then this young missionary, with tears in his eyes, said. “Brothers and sisters, I have received my mission call, I ‘m going to Costa Rica.”

There is a sequel to this story. About a year after the sacrament meeting, the bishop received a letter from the missionary in Costa Rica. The letter had one sheet of paper in it and on that sheet written in capital letters were four words:

I FOUND MY FRIEND

My testimony continues to grow and strengthen with every day that I choose to live a Christ like life and follow the commandments. I also can not wait to go forth and spread Heavenly Father's word with the rest of the world! But until then, I'll prepare myself for that time, so then things will go just the way they need to be. 

How Did Something So Good, Happen To Me?

In this month's General Conference, on the Sunday Morning session discussed Elder Russell M. Nelson said:

"Anybody who studies the workings of the human body has surely "seen God moving in majesty and power." Because the body is governed by divine law, any healing comes by obedience to the law upon which that blessing is predicated. 

Yet some people erroneously think that these marvelous physical attributes happened by chance or resulted by a big bang somewhere. Ask yourself, "Could an explosion in a print shop produce a dictionary?" The likelihood is MOST remote. But if so, it could never heal it's own torn pages or reproduce it's own newer editions!"

Even though this statement by the surely entertaining Elder made the crowd laugh, there really was sincere meaning behind what he was saying that not only was relative to what he was speaking of. But it came across as a personal revelation to myself. The thought of "How could something so good, happen to me" has been running through my mind a lot these last few weeks. Every time I step foot into institute, meet with the missionaries, spend time with my friends from church, kneel down and pray, open my scriptures or simply just take the time to sit back and really look at how wonderful this life can be and embrace the beauty that is our bodies and the complexity that we have; like Elder Nelson mentioned in his talk at Conference. There is a lot to take in and if you don't take the time to sit back and really sit still, listen to what God is trying to tell you and appreciate everything in life that you do have. Then it all goes to waste and what was the point anyways? 

This General Conference really was a superb experience. Getting to be in the same room as the Prophet and Apostles, and knowing that the Spirit was there and every person in that Conference Center with me, came to listen to the Word of God was one of the most calming feelings I've ever felt in my entire life. Knowing that there is a God, our Father in Heaven and Christ our Savior who loves us with every fiber of their being and even if I, or you , or anybody else were the ONLY one who came to this earth to live this mortal life, Christ would still come to atone for you. Knowing that the love that they have for us is so infinite is enough for me to keep going. So what I want to say that made me feel like our Father in Heaven was speaking directly to me through Elder Nelson, is when he said "Could an explosion in a print shop produce a dictionary?" Well to me it seems like my life has! Not so literal and extreme, but that leads back to "How did something so GOOD happen to me??" 

Looking back on how my life was before I was a member, then how life was the month I was taking the lessons from Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa. THEN to see how my baptism was and life therefore after. It still shocks the crud out of me and I still can't believe that something so amazing, so wonderful and so full of grace and love could have happened to me. It feels like my print shop did explode and create a dictionary. But that explosion was my faith finally breaking through and the dictionary.. well I have no way of comparing that to anything but I do know that even though it feels like everything happened so suddenly like that, it still happened for a reason from God. I love it. 

I'm thankful for this every day, I'm thankful for the restored Gospel and the opportunity I had to go to Conference with one of my most best of friends, Savannah. The opportunity to sustain our Prophet, President Thomas S. Monson as Prophet, Seer, and Revelator, along with all the apostles. Then getting to see Temple Square and talking to sister missionaries while doing so. Heavenly Father loves us, and even though life gets hard and we feel lonely from time to time, everything in the end will be worth it. And that I can testify of with everything that I am, love and believe. 

On This Day In History

I feel like a broken record player, talking about this as much as I do. But I think my enthusiasm will someday take me somewhere! So that's why I don't bother to change my ways. But on this day in history, one year to be exact; I was baptized into the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints! My love for our Lord and Savior has never been as strong as it has been in this last year. I honestly think it's even safe to say that I don't think that love ever even existed before this year. Which is definitely a huge step for me, since I've changed so much throughout the last year, I'm still me. But, just a better, more positive version of me.

This week doesn't only mark my one year anniversary of being a member of this wonderful church. But this week, I will also be attending the April 2012 General Conference up in Salt Lake Utah City with Savannah and her family. Along with going out to dinner with Elder Saager and his new companion, Elder Lloyd! There is just a ton that will be filling this week up and honestly, I really can't wait. It's been six months since he has been transferred out of the Del Cerro ward, and I've progressed a lot since both him and Elder Malietoa have moved on in their life's journey. Which to say, is really good and I'm looking forward to getting the opportunity to catch up with him and to get to know his new companion. Who I got to meet a few weeks ago at the latest Mission President Fireside.

My testimony is strengthened every day. Every time I kneel down and pray, every time I meet with my home teachers, every time I step foot into institute and church, every time I read the scriptures and every time I get the chance to meet with the missionaries. Beauty is all around us, because Heavenly Father has allowed it to. Jesus Christ formed the atonement so we could be happy, so we could live to serve Him and so we could prove ourselves ready and worthy to come back to our Father in Heaven and I intend on taking advantage of that as much as I positively and possibly can. I know that He live, I know that my redeemer lives and I know that they both love us dearly.

My mission in life is to testify of Christ and of all the many blessings that He will allow to be in our lives if we decide to follow His commandments, be baptized in Christ's name and do whatever we can to Serve Him. I must be doing something right, because Heavenly Father has worked some really extreme miracles into my life. Meeting my missionaries, Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa was definitely a life changing experience, and I hope that they know that I'll always love them for everything that they've done for me and I hope to always have them in my life. I know that everything that they did was done by Heavenly Father. I know that through them He was able to work great joy into my life, but like I've expressed before; even though we have agency, everything still happens for a reason. I was in that church building that first time for a reason. I met Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa for a reason, I became friends with Savannah for a reason. And I just have to say, I love that. I feel, incredible. I feel the hand of the Lord in my life and I know He listens to me. He listens to all of us and he is incredibly mindful of us, whether we realize it or not.

Which is why I'm really looking forward to going to G.C and hearing what the Lord has in store for us to hear this time around. I'm excited to be able to experience that journey and to visit Temple square. Which means that I'll be able to cross off another Temple that I've visited.

I hope that the year to come will bring as many great opportunities as this year has, and I hope that I will receive the opportunity to help others and serve like I have this year. I love this church, I love our Father in Heaven, our Savior Jesus Christ, and everybody that I've come close to through the church. This path, will someday take me home!

I Feel The Spirit! No Seriously, My Face Is Tingling!

So as we are nearing the end of March, which means we are approaching the first General Conference of the year and I am really really excited! It's also less then a week until I've reached the year mark of my baptism into the church, and I have to say WOW. Seriously, what an AMAZING journey this has become. I've never experienced something so wonderful in my entire life and I just have to say, I am extremely blessed. I am beyond blessed, I seriously wish that I knew of another word that could describe how loved and lucky I feel. But alas, my vocabulary isn't as great as I wish it could be, also I don't think that there is a word out there that could even begin to explain how I feel.

But seriously, I've loved every minute of the way, even during the sad times. My relationship with Heavenly Father, Christ our Savior, the friends I've made in this church and the missionaries that I've become friends with along the way are what have built me up from being just this rifraf hoodelum to a productive young women and I have a lot to be thankful for. I've come to notice that some of the most important people in my life are people who are currently serving missions, which is what leads to the title of this post. I just couldn't help myself. Elder Geier, who has come to be one of the goofier elders I've gotten to know, said that in a lesson that I had with them last week and I just HAD to have it be the title of this post. As funny as it is, it's true what he said. The spirit affects us in different ways, whether we start to cry, we feel a little hazy, there is a burning within us, or we start to tingle. Every one of those is an affect that I've felt while feeling the spirit, and I just loved how he came right out with it!

But in all seriousness, life is good. I'm excited to say that I an 95% sure that I will be going to General Conference with Savannah and her family. I've asked my Bishop for tickets and all that we have to work out is the ride situation with Savannah's family and how things are going to work. Along the trip they wanted to go camping and I wouldn't mind going with, but there are still some kinks in the plan that need to be worked out, but I have faith that things will work out right, or at least the way that they are suppose to. Going to General conference is definitely going to be another huge step in my life. Especially since just recently, I've grown to understand just how serious and important G.C really is! Along this trip, I'll not only be experiencing the wonders that is conference, I'll be able to cross another temple off of my list of temples I've visited. Temple square is one that I wanted to visit before I went on my road trip last November and got to visit both the Mesa Arizona Temple and the St. George Utah Temple, so you can bet that I am super excited to get to see Temple Square now.

Elder Kazuhiko Yamashita from the Quorum of the Seventy, spoke in the October 2011 Conference on the Sunday afternoon session and it really meant a lot to me when he spoke of his conversion story and how he gained such a strong love for the missionaries, the church and everything they taught him. Even if it did take him a while to really fully understand what they were sharing with him, I was able to really feel the spirit as he spoke and how I was able to relate with him. Which also came into my realization of the true importance with General Conference and it helped grow my testimony of the Prophets and General Authorities of today. Elder Yamashita went on to say
"When I was 17, I didn't really have a good understanding of the messages that the missionaries had been teaching me. However, I had a very special feeling about the missionaries and wanted to become like them. And I felt their deep and abiding love."

I've felt the same way as elder Yamashita, I was also 17 when I was baptized. So for someone as fresh and new to the gospel to hear a talk like the one that he gave really helped lift my spirits and I loved it. Especially since while I was taking the lessons with my missionaries, Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa, there were a lot of things that needed to be covered before my baptism and I didn't have all the time in the world to gain a full testimony in everything that they taught me. All I knew was that I needed to be baptized as soon as possible and as long as I believed this church was true, and wanted to proceed, I would be able to continue my learning and growth after my baptism. Which is exactly what I did and I am so excited to have a great understanding of things now.

I'm so excited for this new journey. I can't wait to go to Conference and go to Temple square. I'm always looking for new adventures to go on, whether physical or spiritual OR BOTH! And this definitely will be something to remember forever!

Nearer My God To Thee

This month on the 26th, it will be an entire year since I've joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This time last year, I was taking the steps towards the path that would someday take me home to be with our Father in Heaven and Christ our Savior. But looking back at this time, I would have never guessed where I would have made it to and how much I would grow during the year to come. So looking back and reflecting on how much I've been able to grow and how much I've accomplished is simply astounding. I've met my best friends, my family and my brothers and sisters during my time in the church and I've also formed the most important relationship of all. A true, deep and loving relationship with my Father in Heaven and our Savior Jesus Christ. Which is above everything else I've established during this year, every bit of my life now is exactly how it's suppose to be and I am extremely pleased with the outcome.

In March of 2011 I was being taught the lessons by my missionaries, Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa. Two of the most inspiring men I've ever met in my entire life. Through them, I was brought the one true restored Gospel that is on this earth today. Through them, Heavenly Father answered my prayers and lead me to Him, his only Begotten Son Jesus Christ and the opportunity for true, eternal happiness in His Kingdom. A favor such as what Elder Saager and Elder Malietoa did for me will never go unrecognized, so I have a lot to be thankful to them for. Especially during this year, I've remained very close friends to them even though Malietoa has finished his mission and is now in College. And Elder Saager was transferred up to the Penasquitos 3rd Ward, our friendship and respect for each other continues to grow. They are two of my absolute best friends in the world, which leads to the main point in which I am trying to make in this post. Heavenly Father works in very mysterious ways, in which he works in our lives miracles that we never even imagined possible. But it takes a lot of work on our part to make sure that we are spiritually prepared and well feasted upon the scriptures and pray every day so we are prepared to receive whatever blessings Heavenly Father has in store for us. These blessings come in all shapes, sizes and forms, and we have to be spiritually prepared to see what God is trying to tell us. I've learned that I receive a lot of my answers to what I pray for through the people I associate myself with and who I learn to love and become close to.

It's different for everybody though, since everything is learned line upon line and precept upon precept. Nothing is ever the same and what would work for one person, may not work for me. Revelation comes in tricky ways and at times, we allow ourselves to become so absorbed into what the world is bringing us and the noise from the world tends to cover all of what comes from the Spirit if we allow it to. And I've learned this lesson through Elder Jones, another missionary that I became really close friends with while he was in my current ward. He told me about a man that would put whatever spare change he had in his pocket from the end of the day in a jar. He did this every day for many years, until one day he decided to exchange the change in and when he did, he had a HUGE amount of money. I can't quite remember the amount the Elder Jones told me, but it was a couple thousand, maybe even more. He compared that to our daily scripture reading and prayers. If we continue to build ourselves up every day with the knowledge and strength we get from the scriptures then by the time our mortality is up, we will be significantly and eternally blessed. Which sounds great if you ask me!

Anyways, I hope that all made sense, i'm rambling and this post is getting really long. I'm just extremely happy that I got to see all my amazing Missionary buddies last night at the Mission President Fireside and I am just so excited for everything that is coming this month. Elder Saager and I talked a bit last night and decided that we want to get together on my year mark, which is the 26th, and we are going to have lunch and catch up. So this year has just been perfect. I am so happy and thankful for all the blessings that have been placed in my life, simply because of my decision to follow the Lord's commandments, pray, read my scriptures and form the relationships that I have formed. And I cant wait to see how the year to come will treat me!

If Thou Shalt Ask, Thou Shalt Receive

Two Sundays ago I met Elder Patrick Kearon from the Quorum of the Seventy and it was such an amazing and blessed experience. It was fast and testimony meeting and already that is usually incredibly amazing just on our own. But the spirit that Elder Kearon brought into the room was so phenomenal I was in tears for almost all of Sacrament meeting. Often, I would wonder what it would be like to meet a General Authority. In the time that I've been a member of this Church, I've heard many stories from friends, counsel members and even missionaries of when they first met a General Authority. All of which were great stories and I loved hearing every single one of them, but unfortunately something had kept me from really having a great and spiritual understanding of how much it really meant to them and how important that really had been.

Up until recently, I had developed such a strong testimony in everything that I have been taught up until this point except one thing. During the time I was taking the lessons from my Missionaries it seemed like they had done a good job of making sure that I knew great amount of the Church's doctrine and beliefs. Which I felt was purely amazing and I had already known that this was where I needed to be and my life from then on depended on Christ the Savior and my Heavenly Father. One thing that I feel like we did not get to discuss before my baptismal date is the fact that there are living Prophets and Apostles on this earth today that have been chosen by God Himself. That was not really all that well explained to me which is completely understandable because I had no time to learn text books worth of information on each topic. Especially since I knew that I knew enough and I knew that every ounce of my being, my heart, soul, mind and every fiber of my body knew that this Church and Gospel was true. So I eased my mind with just telling myself and trying feel reassured with the fact that as time went on I'd learn more and have more time to build and make testimonies that I had already mostly developed. Which I did, my testimony grew more and more every day and with every time I read the scriptures, went to church, spent time with the friends I had made in the church, spoke to Heavenly Father and met with my missionaries. Everything was growing and going so smoothly that in a short time I had completely forgotten my goal in forming a testimony in the Prophets and Apostles of today. 

When after going for so long without worrying about the goal that I had set up for myself, one day a while back it hit me. It was during another fast and testimony meeting at church and somebody had gone up and shared their testimony on the Prophets and Apostles of this day. It was so simple, yet so pure and beautiful and that was seriously all it had taken for that seed to be planted within me. That's when I knew that I needed to do my best to continue watering that seed, then as it grew into a small plant I knew that I needed to keep nurturing it and making sure that I was taking as good care of that seed. Which happened slowly and surely and it definitely became something so special to me and I'll never forget the experiences that it took to gain that testimony.

So never be afraid of sharing yours, even if you feel like it's not good enough, long enough or even strong enough. That's not true, what makes your testimony special is that it's yours, and you never know what seed will be planted in who. That's what happened to me, the quick and simple yet so pure and beautiful testimonies of my fellow brothers and sisters, telling me that they knew that the Prophets and Apostles of today are the true Prophets and Apostles called of God. That's all it took and since that moment I've never given up on it and neither should you.

Pray As If You Were To Die Tomorrow

At this point in time I am counting down the days. My excitement level is exceptionally high and my spiritual enlightenment level is through the roof. Never in my entire life have I ever stayed so dedicated and focused on anything until now. In 55 days it will be a whole year since I was baptized and confirmed a member of this true church of Jesus Christ and accepted the one true restored gospel that is on this earth today into my life. Since then I've done nothing but improve, grow, and learn which leads me to what I wanted to discuss in this post. In my journeys both spiritual and physical, which have taken place in this last year I've learned and discovered so much about the gospel, it's doctrine, prophets, history, Heavenly Father and of Christ the Savior himself that it's lead me to learn more about myself then I even thought was possible. 

Revelation comes to us in funny ways. It also comes in ways that are so profound that you have no clue what so ever how to deal with it or even understand. Both of these ways are very crucial for our spiritual growth and ability. But when simplicity comes your way, take advantage of that with nothing but positive intent. The title of this post is called Pray As If You Were To Die Tomorrow for a reason and that's to bring up a topic that was brought up in my stake's conference just two weekends ago. Like I said, revelation varies. But whether we realize it and understand what's being brought forth unto us is up to us. Everything comes in the Lords time frame and if we choose to ignore that or not take it as seriously as we should then that would be us bringing disappointment into our lives. Not Heavenly Father. Lately, I've been having a very hard time dealing with patience and discipline. Every single day I pray about it, asking for help and strength for me to do whatever it is that I need to do to please Heavenly Father, my supervisors and the costumers whom I'm working with at work since my discipline and patience problem has been stretched out the most with my work life. But if I had not recognized the importance in knowing that everything happens in the Lord's time frame, then I would have driven myself crazy by now. Which is where the phrase "Work as if you were to work a hundred years but pray as if you were to die tomorrow" comes into play and made a significantly huge impact on me. 

Since my patience and discipline had been tested the most recently, to hear Elder Snow of the seventy share that quote with us during stake conference, my eyes were opened to something completely new and amazing. Heavenly Father doesn't just give us what we pray for. He recognized what is in our hearts and what is in our minds, then when we come to him with our prayers and ask for him to place his hand in our lives is when he steps up to the plate and works with us. So when I would kneel and pray to him, asking for patience and discipline, he didn't just hand it over to me on a silver platter. He gave me more opportunities, whether it be at work, home or school to practice what I had been praying for. Elder Simpson also really helped me realize that the same day. But as long as we pray hard, work hard, play hard and love hard nothing can fail as long as it's all placed in Heavenly Father's hands. So I cherish that quote and I cherish the love and strength that Heavenly Father has provided me with. I know that my prayers are important to him and I know that he is very mindful of me and everybody on this earth. We just have to be in the right mindset and be willing to let him, his love and teachings in. 

Revelation has been a very important part of my life in these last ten months, quite obviously since my blog is called Revelation Revolution. But like I said revelation varies. To this day there are still things that I am asking for which Heavenly Father may not have provided an answer for me and he may have and I'm just not paying as close attention as I possibly could. Then there are times where it's like a whack to the face and with this stake conference, that quote was just like it. Heavenly Father works in very mysterious ways. But I'll always appreciate that because it makes you stop, think and listen. Which is something I'll always appreciate no matter what. 

The Light Will Always Find Away

A while back, Elder Kirchhoefer told me something that at the time I had no clue would make as great of an impact on me then it did. But knowing that even to this day I remember what it was and what spirit it brought forth is such an amazing blessing and just reminds me even more of what an amazing missionary he truly is. It was during a very difficult and dark time in my life earlier last summer when I was so sick that I was in and out of the hospital and on several different medications. So not only was I feeling weak physically but spiritually as well, so once I was getting better I met with him and Elder Saager so they could give me a blessing. But along with that blessing came an amazing lesson where Elder Kirchhoefer told me to always remember that darkness can never reside where there is light. But light can always break through in a time of darkness as long as you have faith in our Heavenly Father, sincerely pray to him and read your scriptures.

Having had such an insightful and inspiring thing stick in my head for so long like what he told me, has come in use several times these last few weeks. Within the last month or so, I've had several great opportunities to share the Gospel, the Plan of Salvation and the whole LDS Church. Which before was kind of a rare thing for me since I've never been one to be so opened with my opinions and personal beliefs, since that's never done much good for me in the past and has cost me a lot before.  But these random acts of courage and service have done me a lot of good and have helped strengthen me in ways I never even imagined. So from just telling random people where I work that I am a BYU-Idaho student to actually reading half of Alma 30 to my dad while also giving an in depth explanation of the Plan of Salvation is a very new, wonderful and even frightening. But I know that little by little and step by step I am on the path to not only bringing blessings into the lives of the people I'm sharing with, but my life as well. By praying about these people that I've just met and even the people that I love and care about along with sharing as much as I possibly can, I'm learning how to be the best missionary that I can be and to be more charitable and less shy. All of these encounters have given me hope and have made me truly realize that even in a time of darkness, where nothing seems to be getting better; light can and will always find it's way through if you want it to.

So to anybody who's a convert to this church or has inactive family members, there still is hope. I've learned this from difficult yet rewarding personal experience. Nothing will change unless you have the faith, hope and desire. Even though for a while I never expressed a great concern in my family not having an interest in my church, I've always dreamed of what it would be like to see my brothers go on missions. Or what it would be like to see my dad give a blessing or sit up front with the Bishop as part of the Bishopric and my mom running events in the Relief Society. I've always wished for someday to see that, but I never realized how much it really did matter to me until this time. But my dreams in the past have come true before, so I'm not giving up. I will always do everything in my power to make sure I never give up trying and never forget to show my family and friends the love that Heavenly Father can provide and the spirit that we can feel that can come from this truly restored church.

Alma 44 says But Alma said unto him: Thou hast had signs enough; will ye tempt your God? Will ye say, Show unto me a sign, when ye have the testimony of all these thy brethren, and also all the holy prophets? the scriptures are laid before thee, yea, and all things denote there is a God; yea, even the earth and all things which are upon the face of it, yea, and it's demotion, yea, and also all the planets which move in their regular form, do witness that there is a Supreme Creator.

A Whole New Beginning

The month of December, like it is for most people is always incredibly hectic for me. Even before I got a job and started working on top of going to school. So sadly enough, this is the first post I've made since the very end of November. But now that I'm starting to learn how to handle the ropes of being an adult by dealing with both college courses and working part time, I'm going to be going back to writing a post every week like I originally intended!

Along with getting my first job ever, wrapping up my first semester of college and the holiday season, a lot has gone on in my life spiritually that has had a pretty big impact on me. All of which have managed to help me come up with some sort of idea for a New Year's Resolution. So I've managed to come up with a list of twenty or so things that I either want to achieve, start, stop or continue throughout the year of 2012. I know, I know. Completely cliche, going through with the whole New Year's resolution thing, but I honestly do believe that I will be able to achieve at least half of what I have put on that list. Even then, as long as you are trying you can never fail. Just because you did not accomplish something the first time does not make you a failure. When you give up and decide that it was never even worth your time, then that is when you've failed. So I have a lot of faith and as should everybody else that has decided to truly dedicate themselves to their resolutions, with Heavenly Father everything is possible. Just at times they may seem improbable. 

Several things that are really high lighted on my list of resolutions, I'll list on here just to give an idea of several of the things that I plan on working on throughout this year. 

The first one is to by this time next year, I'll either already be at college or preparing to leave for college for the spring semester of 2013. 

The second one is to work on my optimism and trying my absolute hardest to be a blessing in peoples lives instead of an annoying burden like people have told me that I am in the past. 

The third one is to pray and read my scriptures every single day, not just at night but in the morning as well. 

Then the fourth one I'll share is not as relevant with the first three, but I want to read at least five books throughout the year and actually finish them. 

But this year is the year that I will be able to start off right, this year is the first official year that I'll be having as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. So there is so much in store for me if I play my cards right. Meaning if I follow the commandments, the general authority, read my scriptures daily, pray daily and always bring everything unto the Lord then everything will be just the way it's suppose to be. I'm happy to try out my resolutions and see what kind of a difference I can make in peoples lives. I know that in these last nine months since I've joined the church, I've grown and matured in so many ways, it's kind of scary at times to think about. But now that I've really sat back and realized how I've changed, I need to apply it in my life and become the person that I am inside on the outside as well. I need to become what I know I am overall and I know that I can do it if I just try, have faith and pray about it. Whenever I ask Heavenly Father for help on anything, he always steps up to the plate and does whatever it is that he can to make sure I am doing things right. My faith is strong, I just need to jump out of the nest in which is my comfort zone and see if I make it. 

I've had plenty of amazing people in my life that have taught me a lot, like Elder Saager, Elder Malietoa, Elder Kirchhoefer, Elder Jones, Elder Evans, Elder Geier, Elder Barney, the Read Family, the Coleman Family, the Jackson Family, my home teachers and just random friends I've made throughout the ward. 2012 is going to be my year and I promise that nothing but good will come from this.